Panda punctuation: Eats, Shoots & Leaves book

 

A panda walks into a café. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and fires two shots in the air.
"Why?" asks the confused waiter, as the panda makes towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder.
"I'm a panda," he says at the door. "Look it up."
The waiter turns to the relevant entry in the manual and, sure enough, finds an explanation.
"Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots & leaves."

It's available on Amazon.com and also abebooks.com. Go get a copy.

This is also my defense of the Oxford comma. But in this case, the first comma is wrong and should not have been included.

Crafty commas cause commotions in creative classrooms

In a commotion over a comma? I agree that the comma is a VERY hard thing to understand, but try and be calm about it. (Just ask Grandpa, who has now realized that he's been invited for dinner instead of finding himself AS dinner.)
Try these rules (and spare the old man's life and your error in meal choice!)

Between words or word groups in a series
  Example: Medical supplies, food, blankets, and clothing were rushed to the flood area.

To separate parts of a compound sentence
 Example: Many homes were flooded, and owners had to be rescued by police. (You can make two sentences: the comma helps split them apart.)

  To separate a direct quote from the rest of a sentence.
  Example: “We’re going home,” said Nick. She answered, “No, I’m staying.”

  When you speak to someone, use a comma to set apart their name.
  Example:  “Alicia, please come and help me.” 

 IF YOU BEGIN A SENTENCE WITH “Yes,” “No,” “Well,” “Oh,”…..

1.  “Yes, I want to get better grades!” “No, I did not forget!”
2.  “Well, I’ll just try it again.”
3.   “Oh, I did my work yesterday.”

     * The “Oxford” Comma

 Used with three items:
Example:  “Peter, Paul, and Mary were a folk group during the 1960s.”
 *(This often appears as “Peter, Paul and Mary.”)
  (But this is the reason for the Oxford comma: otherwise, how do we separate the 2^nd and 3^rd members or items?)

 Transition phrases get help from commas

1.  Example: Generally, one can see a transition phrase followed by a comma.
2.  Example: Moreover, they are at the head of a sentence.
3.   Example: However, there’s always someone who forgets them!
4. Example: Therefore, use them with a comma!
5. Example:  In fact, they work much like transitions.
6. Example: On the other hand, they lend a big hand to a sentence.
7. Example: For that matter, they handle the work of a smaller phrase.
8. Example: All things considered, they are useful.

 BIG intro phrases get commas

1. Example: As far as I’m concerned, it’s just about obvious that a comma makes a difference.
2. Example: In spite of the best intentions, students still argue and fuss that they don’t understand them.
3. Example: After all the presentations are done, I’m sure everyone grasps the idea—or else.

If two or more adjectives describe or modify the same noun, make sure they work separately if appropriate:

1.   “He was a bashful, sleepy kid.”
2.   “The eager, radiant princess kissed the slimy, vile frog.”

  (Each adjective works by itself)

  Other uses of commas
In addresses, to separate smaller from larger units: Washington, D.C.
 Albertville, Alabama

 Date (if day/month/year is used. NO if only month-year):
 June 14, 2006, was a very good day for a wedding.

The Oxford Comma: don't leave a group of words without it

And now a few syllables about the Oxford comma. I use it--and I find most people (especially Americans) don't like it--nor do they understand its purpose. The rule in general with a group of three items is to use a comma for the first item, then use the word "and" between the second and third. For example, a popular folk group in the 1960s were Peter, Paul and Mary. (In a similar way, a progressive rock band that I liked during the '70s were Emerson, Lake and Palmer.)

Enter the Oxford comma, which puts a SECOND punctuation mark after the 2nd item: "Peter, Paul, and Mary." And that's why I use it: in the first example (without the Oxford comma), if Peter was on time for the gig but Paul didn't show, did Mary also not perform? If Emerson and Lake were onstage but Palmer was still in the dressing room, did the band get full credit? Of course not.

If you look at the image I've used as an example, it is rather horrid--but you get the point. No, I won't melt down if you don't use the Oxford comma--but if you read anything I write, you'll notice it. For example, the law firm Dewey, Cheathem, and Howe. (I'm not very fond of lawyers--sorry. But that came from the "Car Talk" radio show.)