Holiday (Horror Day) High School - Chapter Two

(From my book Welcome to Holiday (Horror Day) High School) (On Amazon.com)

 Chapter Two

“Werewolves and Vampires have to go to school too”

          On the other hand, it was Wally Mendoza’s idea that gave the school our special pet name: “Horror Day.” That’s because Wally had a fear of tests that made him scratch and itch whenever the teacher in that class put a paper in front of him. He’d say, “It’s a horror each day I get tested,” or “I feel horrible about how I did on the exam.” We just shortened the phrase to fit the school identity. It was bad enough that Wally was the hairiest boy in school. It was something about his genetics: his family came from Mexico, and they had cousins who worked in the circus as “the wolf people.” It’s a medical fact: Wally’s family had something different in their DNA that caused hair to grow all over. (For the record and for anyone who is into unusual and unique medical genetics, it’s called “Hypertrichosis.”) Wally was the only kid in second grade who had a full mustache. By the time he was with us in 10^th grade, he had a full beard—and I mean ALL over his face—and his arms and back and chest looked like a thick black rug had been stitched onto his body. Naturally, we called him “Wolfie” for fun, but he also had a strange way of verbally letting out his frustrations when he got his grades.

   

Wally would let loose with a long “Oh-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!” when he didn’t do well on an exam. He really howled—like a wolf! Well, it was more of a wail of distress than a true wolf’s sound. Of course, this was on a regular basis each semester in just about every class. I think the teachers fudged his real report card grade just became they felt sorry for him. And it also unnerved them to hear him let loose like that. It just came naturally to Wally to let out this agonizing groan of dismay. So when he howled, we all joined in with him. It drove our teachers nuts. We didn’t care if we had better grades—it was just fun to groan and howl with Wally.

          The weather itself also made it difficult for some of my friends to manage themselves in the blazing heat that really took off in May and lasted through September. Like I said: we were from Las Vegas, and believe me, there were and still are some scorching summers!

I mention the weather because Igor Danielovich had a real serious problem with sun exposure—which is one reason how he ended up so pale-looking. And he was lacking the natural skin color to protect himself: He was also medically supposed to stay out of the sun because he didn’t have the natural pigment in his system. Igor was an albino, and he had blonde-white hair too—which he later dyed dark brown. (“Why did you do that?” we asked him. He replied, “I wanted to look like I fit in with everyone else.” We just looked sideways at him, but at his height, he never noticed.)

It’s also one reason we called him “Dracula,” but in all fairness, Iggy (which is what we called him on a good day in his view) was also 7’0” and 120 pounds when he was sixteen. He didn’t gain much weight after that, and he was the longest, tallest beanpole of a boy I ever saw.

He also had a strange way of eating an orange. Actually, he didn’t actually eat it with his teeth—he drank it. With a straw. Igor had a way of putting a thick straw into an orange and then sucking out the juice. We didn’t call him “Dracula” for just one reason, see?

We also called him “Casper” like the friendly ghost because Iggy really was a great guy and very funny to know. Iggy didn’t like the vampire nickname, but he wasn’t too fond of being known as a ghost either. It was okay when a girl said it to him—but it made him blush.

And THAT, I assure you, was a sight to behold. It was like watching a big vanilla milkshake turn into a strawberry float.

Welcome to Holiday (Horror Day) High School! (A funny look at Grades 9-12)

On Amazon.com

(PS: After our 50th reunion last year, I stopped by and gave a copy to the current principal.

He had NO idea of these stories. Well...NOW he has homework!!)

 

 

 Welcome to a new school year! On Amazon.com Kindle or paperback.

Welcome to “Horror Day” High School.

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Meet the Class of ‘67: it’s a typical teenage crowd—with a European, 7’0”, 110-lb. albino “vampire” who sucks the juice out of oranges through a straw, a hairy wolf-boy who howls over tests, the Hulk-in-football pads, a pink lollipop-Valentine girl, a Brainiac, a Halloween Goth-witch, a Christmas surfer girl, and a guy with green skin—and hair!

👻👻👻

It’s really “Holiday High School” in Las Vegas. These are the memoirs of “the Dirt Devils,” the weird-and-wild-ones who “did it their way” enroute to graduation before the fame, notoriety, and legacies of success in business as adults—but not before they turned the world of education on its head.

The boys love monster movies at the drive-in shows, putting cars on top of the auditorium roof for fun, and scaring the opposing football teams with weird cheers—and their appearances. The girls like to dress according to their favorite holiday colors—and keeping up with the mischief.

Join them as they craft bizarre school songs, smoke cigars in empty classrooms, engage in spitball-straw cannon fights, and overall, leave the administration hanging from the ceiling in dismay.